#(i can quit anytime i want)
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fluffishere · 7 months ago
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littlewhispersmokesigns · 5 months ago
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Buying one more essay collection and then I’m done for good I swear just one more
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lemongrablothbrok · 1 year ago
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In which I have another stupid mental interaction with myself over Led Zeppelin
Me #1: *minding my own business*
Me #2: ...heeheehee...
1: *still trying to mind my own business, and failing*
2: Pffffffft!
1: What? What's so funny?
2: Nothing, nothing, I just- *wheeze*
1: What is it?
2: ...I just thought of a funny thing...
1: Okay? Well, let's hear it.
2: "THE SCHLONG REMAINS THE SAME"! Bwahahahahaha!
1: 😒
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longeyelashedtragedy · 2 years ago
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gonna miss deki so much :(( never getting over this
feel u friend i've already cried once today
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lemongrablothbrok · 1 year ago
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They look like a gang. With Bonzo as the leader. Bad Boy Bonzo and his gang of fancy boys. They gon' fuck you up.
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heart-of-the-morningstar · 7 months ago
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Don't look at my photo roll, please and thx :)
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kingslayerstew · 3 months ago
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disdaidal · 9 months ago
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I wanna thank my irl friends who follow me here and also my beloved mutuals as well as followers who still send me kind messages and try to interact with me and my stuff even if I'm bad at doing it myself.
Honestly, things haven't been that great with me lately, so... it means a lot to me. Honestly. <3
#personal#i had to make the tough decision to drop out of school last week#i didn't exactly want it if i'm being completely honest here#but certain stuff was preventing me from getting further so i knew the teachers are gonna ask me to quit over at our teams meeting#i instantly contacted my nurse about my situation. and she got me a doctor's appointment which was yesterday#where i kind of broke down a little. not because she didn't grant me the sick leave i thought i was going to get#after feeling down and sleeping terribly for weeks#but because she actually *got me*. like. she actually listened to me and figured out some stuff and told me that#what i'm going through and what i've been going through for years would make anyone depressed#so i couldn't help but cry a little because yeah. i'm so tired of never being enough no matter how hard i try#because my brain's wired a certain way and it makes me slow and kinda clumsy and inattentive at times#which. you might guess is not ideal at today's work environment. or studying-wise even#so instead of granting me sick leave (she did say we can change that at anytime though) she told me to wait for that phone call#from the unemployment office. which i should be getting tomorrow. or well. later today#and talk to them about this. to see if they can offer some solutions. or if we can figure something out#'cause i'm getting closer to my 40s and not getting anywhere and it's wearing me out and tiring me out#because i clearly can't help myself or change my ways on my own#i managed to get some work last week though. at the local youth house. one shift though but money still#but i haven't been getting those offers a lot during the past few months so it's not enough to support me obviously#so i definitely need something else. and i hope i can get help. that someone could help me#i should finally get tested for adhd next month too. i don't know if i even have it or if it's gonna change anything but#at least i'd know#anyway i needed to get this off my chest. cause i'm kinda crying a little bit even now just thinking about this whole thing#sorry
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lemongrablothbrok · 1 year ago
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This is the picture I showed my friend recently to illustrate just what the man who's giving me such internal torment as of late looked like in his prime. I don't remember quite what she said, if anything, but if I recall correctly, there was some vocal and/or facial gesture of understanding.
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This was the picture that did it.  I had seen him in plenty of photos at different times in his life, but for some reason this one pushed me OVER the edge, past the point of NO return where I am now.  It’s that look in his eye, what is he thinking?  The fingers curled around the paper or napkin...the tummy fuzz and the skin which looks golden even in black and white photo.  
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unproduciblesmackdown · 3 months ago
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(genderly) chill as hell if i was only ever glimpsed / detected like this
#Shrouded In A Rectangle neither sleeves nor an open front to be besieged with? yes#just doing whatever else like doesn't matter. tee cargo shorts which is my best guess rn of my ideal outfit. + sandals Absolutely#unfortunately my hair could never do that. somehow neither am i yet like forties fifties? have i not been at this for eons?#i Can be like uh let's just nobody talk to me i'm busy pensively perceiving truths that you don't ever actually wanna hear about#just the other day it was like hey....a [way Having To Talk could be a difficulty / problem] was under my nose in this lifelong pattern#certainly noticing the Verbal Exchange Demand heaped upon burnout as like [delay delay delay struggle weariness stress]#but also who knows like spent plenty of time just probably indeed Not having to have such exchanges while burned out. not noting them#anyway like this isn't even [dysphoric Ideal Outfit until i could [whatever supposed even more ideal than that gender euphoria]]#though shoutout to that but like nah get shrouded anyway. the only [how do i look] im motivated to consider is: when it's a costume#when it's just me it's like. i guess whatever pants and a comfortable enough tee. need glasses. hair's w/e so cut quite short ig#might accessorize w/things that are fun to me like hey yeah yknow i might want a calculator watch#[yea as a kid it was like :( im actively appreciating the animals supposedly Gross or Bad] if i had hated little friends Sure yaay#if i had disorienting light effects like a pelagic creature. but you don't even need that. like hey i'm nd in real life. i got it#chat i'm in the walls too bestie lmao. if only my bigfoot pose reference Step was this good#tl;dr long rephrasing of my being like; now the gender slay....#& nodding & Noting when [worksheet exercise: what's your gender euphoria look?] is like shrug idk. but this is serving maximally to me; so#going Chat how can i up my uncanny stats. looking up ''isn't it like Uncanny knowledge e.g. so like why not....canny''#but i think the un canny is the Uncanniness Accuser's perspective. not of My ken. your literal weird one maybe#so again apt to be like jk i'm just autistic & shit; i got it....horror shit challenge impossible: Don't have sm typical mundane#[disability moment] as like Unsettling danger/malice cues. challenge impossible; again#subverted here like as [horror holding hands touching foreheads w/comedy] w/o Rescinding just casual disabled behavior/qualities#just remembered like three witches weird sisters etc macbeth. weird uncanny soothsaying gendering. word#anyway i should be shrouded (made no any connection whenever i put the blanket now over my head & shoulders in place min ago)#perhaps the real Ideal Look insight: i do not have any way i wish to be observed by people. secret passages / removed room anytime
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lemongrablothbrok · 1 year ago
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Yo I think my Google feed is trying to taunt me about my recently renewed obsession with Led Zeppelin and/or Robert Plant.
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purplecatghostposts · 9 months ago
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Doing a Wyll Origin Run and this dialogue in particular is so FUNNY to me. It’s a Human Dialogue Option but it happening between Gale and Wyll feels canon.
Gale trying to argue they should try to turn Raphael’s deal in their favor and playing the Human card, and Wyll, one of two embodiments in the party of why you shouldn’t trust devils, shutting him down immediately.
[Dialogue Written in case it’s hard to see + id reasons:
Wyll: I’ll remind you that when dealing with a devil, you always draw the short straw.
Gale: There’s no such thing as absolute certainty.
Gale: Let me play the devil’s advocate: the man is too eager. Do not dismiss his offer out of hand.
Gale: If there’s one such quality all the denizens in the Hells embody, it’s ambition. A quality they share with many humans, come to think of it…
Wyll: Speak for yourself, Gale.
Gale: Fine— but my reasoning is this.]
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musubiki · 1 year ago
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lime for some reason or another has to spend a night or two without mochi charging station and is excessively cranky the following day(s)
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varjopeura · 1 month ago
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#oh hey i just caught myself harboring Unnecessary Nightmare Scenarios#that last post made me think about how the only thing stopping me from getting another dog is money#like i could afford having a friend for savu. it would be no problem#BUT in a situation where i lost my partner and had to provide for the dogs by myself and they'd both get sick i'd be in deep trouble#which has sounded like a completely rational thing to be aware of. a completely valid reason for not getting another dog#except that is quite a few things that need to go wrong before the deep trouble would actually hit#and is that really the way i want to live my life? waiting for this relationship to end? accepting that eventually i will be left alone?#that my current life is nothing but a brief respite from a continuous struggle with both finances and illness? a glitch that will soon pass#it actually doesn't sound valid at all when i write it out like this#i have a partner who brings another stable paycheck into this household. i have no reason to believe this would change anytime soon#i have a wonderful dog that would probably benefit from having a friend#shelties are not super prone to any major lifelong diseases or such so it's unlikely the new dog would need constant expensive treatments#i think this thought pattern got a hold of me when savu got sick last spring#it was scary and unpleasant and i still feel raw around the edges after experiencing all of it#(the dog is fine by the way! definitely better these days and i'm super happy we got the surgery. we have many good years ahead of us still#but like. i'd like if my brain accepted 'this summer was scary and i'm not sure if i'm ready to possibly experience it with another dog'#instead of feeding me lies about a future where i'm all alone and desperately poor#but hey i've never caught this one before! now i know this thought pattern exists and can do something about it#sussitalk
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shinayashipper · 7 months ago
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Deep-talks abt jobs and The Future will always bring me Anxiety back. My brother said if I were braver and less of a people-pleaser I would find better job (and by extension, Better Life) and it's True I know it's True but like... theres also the part in me thats Scared I would be JOBLESS FOREVER you know... like if I were more charismatic / more of a charmer I would be a indie vtuber or something but I can't do That and the safer option is to just get mundane office jobs but it will probably pay less... im so hhhngghh they all want me to stop at my job here and get a Better One and I know they're very worried (and I want to quit too) but it's just so Scary okay
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decarbry · 2 years ago
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would you be willing to elaborate on Yaburemes “birth”/development in the glass tube? Was he conscious during it?
so this is actually the content of chapter 3 (I swear I'm working on the next part, I intend to get faster with them I just keep getting distracted ksdfg) so I'll leave the details for then. he is... semi-conscious for the capsule process. but it's a very low-input kind of consciousness because he's essentially blind, deaf, and mostly immobile for all of it :")
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